Life's Changes

Well, I guess it was time for a change for her. I'm not angry at her, but am very sad obviously.

My wife of several years decided that she needed to look up her previous boyfriend (one she dated before we married). They've been carrying on a relationship for about a while now, I only recently found out after she had left. She's turns 50 next year, so I guess she needed to grab up some new dick, you know just in case everything goes badly for her at 51... When he dumps her, I might laugh, but I am unsure at present.

What a waste, honestly. It is tough enough to have to explain that mom is a just one level above street hooker to the kids, yet she wants to play like all is normal.. hard thing to do. Then when one looks back at so many years, and you have to question, was it all an act? Was I a security blanket for her, sheltering her from her former husband and his physically abusive behaviors? I have no idea. All I know is that my life as I knew it is now lost. My direction is gone, and my purpose is somewhat faded.

Yeah, I will move forward from a life objective point of view, but damn it hurts to be used like this. To invest so much time, effort, love, life on someone that wanted you only for security, then will hop in the sack with a former fuck because he FINALLY completed his education (not bad for a 44 year old huh?) .. what a fucking waste. Shout out to that retard.. I completed MINE in my 20's...

Karma is a bitch, it will catch them both.

Just in case anyone reads this, I am not looking for sympathy or anything like that. it just helps to vent. Oh, and for anyone that wants to claim this is due to my 'status' or for my crime, go fuck yourself. This is strictly a case of an old whore that decided she needed to move along before her junk dried up..